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July 19, 2014

How to teach your child not to bully

Mausumi Dutta Parenting Tips

Parents are often shocked and upset to learn that their child is a bully in school. Bullying is an intentional behavior that is meant to harm and control another person. It can be either physical or verbal. It has become very common in schools nowadays. Parents and teachers should come forward and join hands to eradicate, prevent and stop bullying in school. They should try to create a safe environment in school where children can develop socially and academically, without being afraid. Sometimes bully leads to more aggressive and criminal behavior in children. So it’s our responsibility to control their bully nature.

Some points to understand a child’s bullying nature and ways to curb them:

Know the reason: Talk with your child and try to know the reason behind his behavior. Kids bully for many reasons. Sometimes they feel insecure and want to be popular among their friends. So they bully their weaker mates. Sometimes stressful environment at home also pushes them to behave rudely with others. Also, parents and siblings with aggressive nature have huge impacts on children’s behavior. Some children have problems in managing emotions like anger, frustration, fear etc. So, try to have a healthy and meaningful communication with your child and find out the actual reason behind hi behavior. Once you know the motive of your child, you can start working on it.

Starting from home: Monitor your child’s behavior at home. It has been observed that a child who has the tendency to do physical fight or harshly criticize their siblings is normally a bully in school also. Make sure your child understand that you will not tolerate bullying at home or anywhere else. Take immediate action if your child is involved in bullying. Start teaching them from home.

Be a role model: Your child will follow your steps. If you behave aggressively in front of your kids, they’ll follow your example. Be a role model for them. Teach them how to react calmly, patiently and non-violently when disagreement occurs between siblings and friends. They need to be taught how to deal with feelings like anger, irritation etc.

Encourage good behavior: Always praise or appreciate your children for their good manners and positive attitude. This type of encouraging responses from parents always motivates a child to treat others with empathy and care. Also teach your child to use hello, goodbye, please, and other beautiful words.

Involve your child in other social activities: Take them to social functions and gatherings so that they can meet new people, make new friends, develop warm bonding with others. These social get-togethers help a child to mix with others easily and hence stop bullying others.

Communicate with teachers, school counselor and school staffs: Keep in touch with them regularly. As they are spending a quality time with your child everyday,they can also help you know and understand the reason behind the behavior of your child.

Talk to his peer and their parents: Peers play a special role here. If your child has friendship with those who bully others or encourage bully, talk immediately to them and also their parents regarding your concerns.

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